Posted on January 5, 2016
Pens and busted bubbles
I love calendars. And pens. And all office supplies.
A new pen can brighten my day and give me new perspective. I collect them worse than shoes. I feel like a new pen can help me conquer the world.
So imagine my delight when the new year rolls around and new calendars/planners/pens are all around.
I’m a scheduler. And an over-committer. They are very much related. And they are all written down in my multiple calendars.
The fridge synopsis has only the week’s activities listed with which kid and time and where to be.
The wall calendar (by the fridge) has the entire year planned out and neatly color coated by person.
The desk calendar at work has some kid stuff penciled in and all the work weeks lined out all the way to 2017.
The purse calendar is where I write to keep up on the go (instead of using my phone….I just can’t).
The planner that I have worked the hardest on is a work in progress. It required new pens. And stickers. And a binder cover. And colors and highlights and flags.
But today I feel overwhelmed with all the things penciled in and color-coated. Today the reality that my kids go back to school tomorrow has weighed me down. Please understand that I’m usually looking forward to missing them when they go back to school. Their time at school (and not in my office) allows me to miss them and be excited about picking them up from school.
Today as we drove to work and I looked over at my messy haired mini-me, I was hit with a real miss of their fun and funky selves. They will be gone tomorrow. Our Christmas bubble will pop in the morning and all of the world with its hurried-ness and hairiness will barge in without an invite. I will begin competing for their minds and hearts against a world that desires to turn all that is good into something more mature and worldly and loud.
Do you feel this rush around you? Are you planner-ing and feeling the dread of how colored your days seem to be?
This year I’m asking God to refine me. This may include a release of my pens and schedule. It may include and expansion of my protective bubble to people that aren’t my family. It may mean leaving any resemblance of a comfort zone in order to serve and be used for His purpose.
It means that I’m looking forward to being uncomfortable and challenged with a boat-load of unexpected blessings along the way.
It’s not a resolution. It’s a proclamation.
This year I want to Love like breathing…without planning or thinking.
Join me? What are you proclaiming or resoluting in 2016?